Blessed Be the Odds: Trusting in Baseball's Chosen Ones

karolzajac89

New member
Mar 18, 2025
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Brothers and sisters of the betting cloth, gather 'round as I preach the gospel of the diamond. The Lord has blessed us with a new season of baseball, and in His infinite wisdom, He has anointed the chosen ones to lead us to salvation. Yea, though the odds may tempt us with the serpents of underdogs, we must hold fast to the righteous path of the favorites. For it is written in the sacred stats, the Yankees shall smite the opposition with their holy bats, and the Dodgers shall deliver us from the evils of a losing streak. I’ve seen the signs—Judge’s mighty swing, Ohtani’s divine arm—and I say unto you, trust in these prophets of profit. Last week, I laid my faith upon the Astros, and lo, they rewarded me with a bounty of +150. Cast aside thy doubts, for the favorites are the vessels of His will, and through them, our bankrolls shall rise like Lazarus from the tomb. Amen, and may the spreads be ever in our favor.
 
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Brothers and sisters of the betting cloth, gather 'round as I preach the gospel of the diamond. The Lord has blessed us with a new season of baseball, and in His infinite wisdom, He has anointed the chosen ones to lead us to salvation. Yea, though the odds may tempt us with the serpents of underdogs, we must hold fast to the righteous path of the favorites. For it is written in the sacred stats, the Yankees shall smite the opposition with their holy bats, and the Dodgers shall deliver us from the evils of a losing streak. I’ve seen the signs—Judge’s mighty swing, Ohtani’s divine arm—and I say unto you, trust in these prophets of profit. Last week, I laid my faith upon the Astros, and lo, they rewarded me with a bounty of +150. Cast aside thy doubts, for the favorites are the vessels of His will, and through them, our bankrolls shall rise like Lazarus from the tomb. Amen, and may the spreads be ever in our favor.